OK, let’s talk about why dating at 40 sucks. There are a few reasons for that, and I will touch on each one as we move on. For women, I think one of the reasons why dating at 40 sucks is because we are not like the millennials. And also men within our age bracket want to behave like the millennials, or they actually want to date millennials. Let me explain. The young people these days are approaching dating differently.
Why dating at 40 sucks is because maybe we want to do things the old fashion way. A woman in her 40s wants to be taken on a date, she probably wants some flowers too. She wants to be wooed, but these days you find since we are living in the era of Instagram, Facebook, Tinder, and even TikTok. Things tend to move differently, online dating has also contributed to the change.
Reasons Why Dating At 40 Sucks, Maybe We Don’t Want To Do The Chasing
Young women don’t wait to be chased, they do the chasing, so when the over 40s are waiting to be chased, the young ones have already sled into the DMZ. To be honest, I don’t think I would be very comfortable chasing a guy, sure I might send some signals that I am interested but to actually slide into the DMZ and say I want you, or I am super attracted to your, that would not happen.
Making the first move is not something that women over 40 are very comfortable doing. That being said, women in their 40s know what they want so once the guy makes a move, they will be no games. You will know straight away whether she wants to pursue things or not.
The thing, is young women play games because they have all the time in the world to play around, but we older ladies have no time to mess about. also, women who are in their 40s probably have their lives figured out, so they are working and taking care of bills, they probably have kids too so there is no time to waste.
Why Dating At 40 Sucks, Can We Blame The Guys?
And now let’s take a look at guys in their 40s, to be honest, I don’t know what is wrong with men, when they turn 40, they start acting funny. You will find that if the guy was always a responsible guy, suddenly he starts behaving in a very strange way. If he didn’t have tattoos, now he wants to get some, he also wants to get a Mohawk lol.
Sorry if I am stereotyping, if there is a guy who is over 40 and reading this please tell us why you guys start acting strange when you hit 40, suddenly you want to date an 18-year old lol. Also, while we are at it, can you guys please tell us if you still like doing the chasing, or do you now prefer to be chased?
In my opinion, dating at 40 sucks because we put too much emphasis on our age. OK, I am 41 years old but to be honest, I don’t feel that old as a matter of fact I feel better than I felt when I was 25. Although I am not advocating for behaving immaturely, I think you are as old as you feel or you are as old as you think you are.
So You Are Over 40 Life Is Just Getting Sweeter, Don’t Let Yourself Go
As Longs as you have been taking good care of yourself by eating healthy working out and having a good skincare routine, I don’t see why you should feel like dating at 40 sucks. If you want to have a healthy dating life and improve your chances of finding that guy, that you want to spend the rest of your life with, you must position yourself in a way that you are able to meet him.
Whether its going out or online dating, you have to put yourself out there, I am I saying that you have to act desperate and start chasing guys as if your life depends on it? No, that’s not what I am saying. I have had many friends who are over 30 and over 40 who are always complaining about how they are getting old and they probably will never find someone.
But when you look into their lives, they are so busy with their careers, that they have no time whatsoever to meet new people. I mean all work and no play is no fun lol. Get out there, go to a spa, get your hair done, put on a nice outfit, and go out, meet people.
Are Successful Women Arrogant, And Full Of Themselves?
Another thing I have noticed that could make dating at 40 sucks, is some successful women are a bit arrogant and are not easy to approach because they are ready to throw their success in your face. So I think guys get intimidated and stir clear of such women. Be humble, be respectful even if you are successful.
Yeah, we get it, you can afford to buy yourself the finer things in life, but relax a little, if the guy brings you a gift or some flowers don’t make him feel like he should have ordered a bigger bucket.
Being a successful career woman who got her stuff together is a good thing, but that does not mean you get to look down on people. And especially if you are looking to find someone to date and ultimately get married to.
Could It Be That Dating At 40 Sucks Because Of The List?
Another thing that contributes to the misery of over 40 daters especially women, is that must-have list, I can tell you for a fact that my list was long. my list was mainly influenced by the heartaches I had gone through in the past. But also some fantasies played a role in my list.
There is one particular guy who contacted me on a dating site and he said that he was offering me free advice, he said my requirements were superficial and unrealistic. Of course, I gave him a piece of my mind lol. But looking back now I can see that the list was a bit crazy.
I am I saying that since you are over 40 now, you should lower your expectations and just settle for whoever shows interest? No, I am just saying that you should give people a chance, sometimes we think about what we would want but after meeting someone and talking to them we find out the list was not as important as we thought especially when it comes to dressing or even appearance.
Don’t Enter Into A Relationship With The Intention Of Changing The Person
You could meet a guy who thinks is not as tall as you’d have liked but somehow it could work, or he is carrying a few pounds, so what? he can lose the weight if he wants to. That being said, I would not advise you to enter into a relationship with the mentality that you will change the person.
That could go very wrong, just examine yourself and see if you can be with that person the way they are, and if they improve later, then it’s a bonus for you, meaning if the person is on the heavy side, don’t go in thinking I will make them lose weight. Maybe they don’t wanna lose weight, then what?
Conclusion
Yes, Dating at 40 is not that easy, but if you approach it the right way, you will meet someone and you will have fun while you are dating. Just don’t complicate things, relax, and just go out and have fun.
Also, it’s very important to take great care of yourself, don’t let yourself go just because now you are in your 40s. Dress nicely, get your hair and nails done, take care of your skin, have a nice face cream and serum, we are not letting ourselves go. we might be over 40, but we still have a lot of life in us.
Do some dancing, get a karaoke machine or app.
OK, I have said my piece, and now it’s your turn. What in your opinion makes dating at 40 so hard? Let me know in the comment section.
Thank you for your time.
Rose.
