Being in a long distance relationship can be very challenging so today we are going to talk about long distance relationship tips to help you make it work, I know you can make it work. I think I am the right person to talk to you about this because I have been right there where you are today and I completely understand how you are feeling.
Many are times when I lost hope and I got very frustrated, there is no worse feeling than loving someone from a distance. You can’t be with them when you need them the most, and when you are going through a rough time, they are not there to comfort you, yes sure you will get the phone call or the skype or face time but its really not the same is it?
So How Can You Survive A Long Distance Relationship?
Well, I will not lie to you its really hard to be in a long distance relationship, so the first thing you need to do and I think I have mentioned this in one of my previous posts, is to set up a schedule, for your skype or face time conversations, that way you always have something to look forward to during the week.
It’s especially ideal to set it for weekends if possible because that’s when you will feel lonely, I mean when your friends are going to spend time with their boyfriends/girlfriends, you will not have someone to go spend time with since your love is so far away. So set up a face time meeting and plan things that you can do together, you can cook together or do other things check out my tips for a virtual date.
Snail Mail is Very Helpful In A Long Distance Relationship
My husband and I found that exchanging snail mail helpt us so much because it made days move faster, sending greeting cards or letters by post, gives you something to look forward to and also it gives you some kind of physical contact while you wait to be together.
Be in a habit of sending each other small things by post, that way you will be able to break the months that you are spending apart, by giving each other something nice to look forward to during the month or every after two months depending on why you are apart, I know most couples who are in long distance relationships they are probably going through visa application process.
And the Visa applications are very frustrating and take forever, in some cases especially if its US visa they can take years depending on the type of visa you are going for, the K1 visa and the spouse visa can take a long time, so you really have to be patient.
Also when you are going through visa applications, these things cost money and that means the person who doesn’t need a visa, will still find it difficult to travel because of financial strain. For example, you might find a couple who are let’s say one person is American, and the other is a Kenyan, The American does not have trouble getting a Kenyan Visa.
As a matter of fact you can just get your visa at the Airport when you arrive and its valid for 3 months and you only pay about $50, as you can see the visa is not a problem in this scenario, the big problem is the ticket, because a return ticket from lets say Texas to Kenya can cost you anywhere between $1000 to $2000 depending on Airline and the time of the year.
So while you wait for things to go through why don’t you exchange some snail mails and small packages to keep the fire burning so to speak.
Fights During A Long Distance Relationship
This is a big challenge because when you are fighting over the phone or over texts things tend to get ugly very fast couple that with the frustrations of being apart and you have a recipe for disaster. The best tip I can give you is to take time and cool off before you start sending that long chain of texts.
First of all its very easy to have misunderstanding via texts so take your time and evaluate the situation before you jump into conclusions. I remember a big fight my husband and I had via email, I am not even sure how we managed to sort it out because it was really serious.
The fight was caused by one of his friends claiming that I was one of those internet babes who look for men online so I can play with them and maybe drain their bank accounts, luckily I had never asked my now husband for any financial assistance, thank God I was working and sustaining myself. So I had a strong leg to stand on so to speak.
So anyway, my then boyfriend sends me a long email detailing the doubts he is having as well as the points raised by his friend, Keep in mind that the friend had never met me not even on skype, they took it upon themselves to judge me only based on the fact that we (my now husband and I) met online.
Well, the fact that he wrote that email after having few beers didn’t help, and also the fact that he caught me on a bad day didn’t help either.
Well, we had a very ugly exchange and I went to bed that night thinking that was the end of the relationship, any way to make the long story short, the following week we were able to salvage our relationship and move along and a few months later he was able to visit me.
My point being, be very careful of those fights because you are already under a lot of pressure and frustrations and maybe there even some friends who are whispering negative things in your ear about your relationship which makes things even worse. if you are angry about something, bring it up calmly to your partner and give them a chance to explain themselves.
Always Be Transparent
Because of the fact that you are so far apart, the issue of trust will keep arising and its very important that you keep assuring each other that you are indeed serious about your relationship and you are going to remain true to each other no matter what and you are willing to do whatever it takes to make it work.
I mean it’s hard enough to make a relationship work even where there is no distance involved, so by adding the distance issue to the mix, things can get a bit complicated especially when it comes to trust, so make it your habit to share information about your whereabouts even without being asked.
Share your plans for the day, that way you will avoid that question ” where are you?” or what are you doing? Just share information freely. and also keep assuring each other of your love for each other. And finally, make it very clear to your family and friends that you are in a committed relationship despite the distance. That way you will deter anyone with negative issues to raise.
Before I conclude I saw some very interesting quotes that I would like to share ” oceans separate lands not souls”
”Distance means nothing when someone means so much to you” love is what you’ve been through with someone”, these are quotes from life hacks and you can read more here
Don’t let the distance shutter your dreams, if you have found someone that you really love, then work hard toward getting together, in this age where the world has become but a small village, people are finding themselves falling in love with people who are not geographically very close and they have found a way to get together despite all the hurdles they have to jump.
I will be the first one to tell you that its not easy being in a long distance relationship, but with a lot of love, trust, courage, and determination you can make it work, the things I have shared with you today, will help you a great deal in your long distance relationship moving forward.
The greatest advice I can give you as someone who has been there myself, is do not give up, keep pushing and working together toward your goal of building a happy life together and it will come to pass. I wish you luck and if you ever need more tips please feel free to leave me a comment and I will share with you.
My main Goal for creating this website is to help couples who are in a long distance relationship as well as helping those who are venturing in online dating, I have gone through most of the things you are going through and I can help you by giving you useful tips.
Well, I will leave it there, for now, thank you so much for reading this and I hope you have found it useful.
Thank you for your time