Today I want us to talk about International dating and the challenges you will face if moving to another country is in the cards for you. As someone who has moved to a different country to live with my husband, I feel I have some tips that would help you if you are planning to move to another country.
Because I am an African woman, I am going to focus on that aspect. So I am going to talk to African women who are moving to another country maybe in Europe, America, Or Canada. Although, this can also help Filipino, Indian, or any other woman who is moving to another country. The first thing you need to do, as soon as you are sure that you are moving, you need to do some research on your own. You need to learn about the area where you are going to be living in.
Moving To Another County, You Must Do Your Research
You must find out whether you will be living in a city, a town or you will be living in the countryside, this information is very important because it will give you an idea of what kind of life you will be living, and what to expect. Are you gonna be living in the middle of nowhere with no access to the outside world?
One of the misconceptions African women have about the US, Canada, Europe, And Australia, they think that things look like they see in movies, but the fact of the matter is, there are some places where you could end up in the middle of nowhere.
Also, you must make sure that the guy you are with is a citizen of the country you are moving to, this will make your paperwork easier, I am a Kenya, my husband is Danish and we live in Greece so sorting out my paperwork was a nightmare.
Your Guy Need To Be A Citizen Of The Country You Are Moving To
The problem with moving to a country where your guy is not a citizen, you will be dealing with 3 different countries, in terms of paperwork, which can make things quite complicated and it also takes time for you to get your residency and work permit.
If you are on Social media, try joining groups that have people from your country who live in that country, also you need to find out what your options will be in terms of jobs and social life. I mean it’s all good that in the first few months of your marriage/living together, you will want to spend every waking moment with each other but trust me, a time will come when you will want to go out and socialize with other people.
It’s very important to make friends of your own, I mean you will and should try to make friends with his friends, but you do need your own circle of friends.
Once, you get to know the place, and your paperwork is in order, try to find a job as soon as possible, If you are not able to find a job straight away, then take some volunteers job, or sign up for a class, may it be cooking class, or language class. Speaking of language, when dating try to find men who live in countries where they speak your language.
Try To Move To Countries Where You Don’t Need To Learn A New Language
For example, there are countries in Africa where people speak French, if you are from those countries, then try to find men who live in French-speaking countries. This will make things easier for you if things get serious and you have to move to that country. Trust me, as I mentioned earlier, I live in Greece, and learning to speak Greek has been one of the challenges that I am dealing with despite being here for a long time, I still find the language quite difficult.
If you are from English-speaking counties like Kenya, then try finding guys from UK, US, Canada, Or Australia, this will make things easier for you when you are looking for a job, plus you won’t have to spend time learning the language, because you already speak English.
Moving to a country where you have to learn the language, means that you need to spend about a year or two just on the language, because before you can apply for a job, you need to be fluent, so imagine spending two years without working. I mean love is sweet and its all well and good that your husband is providing for your financial needs but let me tell you something, there is nothing sweeter than being able to buy whatever you want without having to ask for money.
You Need To Make Your Own Money No Matter How Little
Besides, if your family back home is not so well of, you will be able to lend them a hand without asking your hubby for money, Finances do cause problems in relationships, so if you are able to make your own money no matter how little, then you will have a sense of independence. And while you are waiting for the paperwork why not start a YouTube Channel, and share your journey?
Did you know that you can make good money with a YouTube Channel? if you have a phone and a ring light, and a cheap microphone, then you are all set. All you need is 1k subscribers, and 4 hours in watch time, then you qualify for the YouTube Partner program where they will place ads on your videos, and you will start earning cash from home.
You can also start a blog.
Culture Shock Could Be A Thing But Don’t Let It Get To You
Try as much as you can to learn the culture of the people where you are living, and respect their beliefs. Try not to be offended by small things. One of the challenges people face when they move to a different country is culture shock. You will find that things are very different from your country.
Also, you might have to change your mindset about certain things, so you need to be open-minded. For example, being from an African country, you might find that European or American kids don’t treat their parents the way we treat our parents. Or you might find especially if you are living in a big city, people don’t necessarily go to sleep the hour you are used to going to sleep.
I remember once, When I was in the US, we were sitting around and it was about 11 at night and it was announced that we were going out for a walk, usually, at that time I would be asleep, so I found it quite strange, also you could find at 2 o’clock in the morning people are ordering a Pizza lol.
Moving to another country is not a joke, there are many things to consider, so be wise and be very careful, the last thing you need is to be in a country where you are not happy and then you end up destroying your relationship because you will be depressed all the time.
Also remember that you will be very homesick the first couple of years so as soon as you can travel, you do need to go back home to see your people and also you need to set up a plan on how many times a year you will be visiting your country.
Well, I will leave it there, for now, if you have any questions or comments, please leave them below.
Thank you so much for your time.